The Unworthy Saint

Starbucks is such a lonely, crowded place.

I so much want people to take notice of me, though I blush and wish to be elsewhere when they do.

So I’ve been drawing most of the last week… just been doing random doodles. It’s very relaxing, I just put on some music and draw whatever comes to mind. For some reason, whatever reason, I’ve been attaching plugs to everything.

I can feel the pride bubbling up, rising up through the 60% water I call my body. Lord help me.

There’s not much of anything better than deep, God-centered conversation with close friends.

So God creates man and then He says “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” So then the Lord goes and creates the animals and marches them all in front of the man. The man names the animals but doesn’t find a helper among them. So God ends up putting the man to sleep, grabbed a rib from him and sculpted a woman out of it. And it ends up that the woman is a suitable helper. (paraphrase of Genesis 2-18-25)

Here’s what struck me as funny – the idea that God creates all these animals and marches them in front of Adam. I can just imagine this is how things went:

“Hmmm, ok, you’re kinda large, grey, with big ears and a small tail. And what’s that thing hanging down there in front, is that your nose?” said Adam.

The soon-to-be-named animal, quite offended by the question, replied “It’s my trunk. I can use it to pick things up, even trees, to small morsels, to rinse myself off with water…”

“Oh, I see. Well then, I’ll call you Elephant.” Adam responded, “And though your trunk is very nifty, and you are very large, you’re not much like me and not quite the helper I need. Thank you very much though. Next animal please.”

As the elephant plodded away the next animal bounded into place, tail wagging.

“Oh, hello there. Lets see, you’re much smaller than the elephant, you have a nice teethy smile, long blonde fur, a peppy attitude. Is there anything special you can do?” Adam inquired.

The animal responded “Oh yes! I can bring you the newspaper or even a beer from the fridge. I’m extremely loyal and would do anything to please. And, I can bark if I see any sign of trouble.”

“Quite nice. You have the most wonderful qualities and very soft fur,” the man said as he petted the animal on the head, “but you’re not quite what I’m looking for in a helper. Tell you what, I’ll make you a deal. Since you can do most everything I like – including fetching beer, the newspaper and being loyal – you can be my best friend. Hows that? Oh, and I’ll call you Dog.”

The dog wagged his tail to and fro and said “That sounds very lovely. Though I’m curious to see who God comes up with for your helper, as I’m sure no one else really stacks up against me.”

Then the Lord asked the dog to fetch Adam a beer. Soon after Adam had drank his beer, he fell fast asleep. God then took a rib from Adam and formed woman. After a time the man woke up and said “Oh, wow man! You formed a chick from my rib. Nifty! Now what shall I call her? How about woman?”

And so woman was created and named. Well, it wasn’t documented, but when the dog saw the woman he said “Yeah, I knew God wouldn’t come up with anything better than me” Well, as it turns out, as time has proved, the dog was right – woman wasn’t anything compared to the dog. Adam’s first mistake was not choosing the dog as his helper. After all, it wasn’t the dog that was deceived in Eden. In fact, someone overheard the dog saying some time later “I would’ve barked at that serpent. I knew something fishy was going on with that fellow.”

Humans are sexual beings.

I think human sexuality is overrated. I think it’s viewed as something somewhat pure or holy, and it isn’t in and of itself. There’s nothing inherently positive about being a “sexual being.” Our being sexual is like coal being black. Our sexuality is an attribute of our being. It’s a fact that we’re sexual. Just as it’s a fact that we’re creative, we’re emotional, we’re sensual (smell, touch, taste, etc).

Humans are spiritual beings.

We’re spiritual first and foremost. It’s not a fact that we’re spiritual beings, it’s what we are – we have souls that are eternal. We were created by God in the image of God. And I’m not saying that makes us holy or pure either, but that’s what we truly are. That’s the root, the core of it. Everything else – our sexuality, our creativity, our emotion all falls out of the idea that we’re spiritual beings. And honestly, our spirituality is the only thing that really matters. If we weren’t creative or weren’t sexual, we would still be God’s children. And our spiritual decisions are the only thing that matters in life.

Where sexuality is a little different from the other attributes of our being is that we were commanded to be sexual. We were commanded in the garden of Eden to “be fruitful and multiply” (Genesis 1:28). But to put our sexuality, even when we’re commanded to be fruitful and multiply, over our spirituality is a grave mistake. We must be diligent in making sure that sexuality doesn’t become something more than it is – that it doesn’t become an idol.

I find myself missing the Asia 2 team and my friend Tim already, just 2 days after they’ve left. When I got back I had people call me or see me and say “Hey, I really missed you, how was your trip?” and I really got how they felt. I couldn’t understand why they would miss me so much. But now I understand. When you’re on a trip, you don’t miss anyone. You’re too caught up in what’s going on wherever you are – and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. But when you’re at home, doing normal life minus the large gaps of those relationships, you notice their absence. And so I miss my girls and my boy. I pray they make it back safely, life is better with them.

An interesting side note about my past: I generally haven’t missed too many people when I’ve moved. Usually one or two, but I’m generally present wherever I am rather than having my mind stuck in some other city with other people.

It is a broken part of me that would look at a friend or stranger and say to myself “their drinking problem is tearing them apart” or “their smoking is killing them” then walk away without questioning or caring for the state of their soul – the only thing that truly matters.

Lots of things feel natural and it’s easy then to assume they’re innocent and/or good, but I think, as Christians, we are called to question and examine everything to see whether it is truly good. Some things that may feel natural but are really sin include pride, sex outside of marriage, homosexuality… these are things that are seemingly non-negatives (as in, murder is pretty obviously wrong, but these may not “feel” wrong) that the world certainly doesn’t call wrong, but are.

Where does dating fit?

Because dating feels “natural” right? Or is it just that the pursuit of intimacy on some level (spiritual, emotional, physical) feels “natural” and dating is the culturally accepted next step if you’re feeling at all interested in someone? Is the desire to date mostly a learned response? Is it the right response? Why do we pressure ourselves into dating someone we just met? Is dating just an attempt at being comfortable, but really something that hinders us (kinda like gluttony aka comfort food)? Is dating neutral in God’s eyes, in our hearts, in our pursuit of God? I mean, just because dating is culturally accepted and endorsed, does that make it ok for you?

Other Thoughts:

It seems as though we’ve made dating the process of binding two hearts together rather than the exploration of two hearts. In most relationships I know of, physical intimacy grows far more quickly than spiritual or emotional intimacy and often comes far before either person has any idea whether they *really* like the other (as in forever).

And since it is the process of binding two hearts, why are we so reckless with each other, why are we so quick to date? Is it because we fear losing them so we feel a need to make some claim on their lives? ie “She’s *my* girlfriend” or “He’s *my* boyfriend.” Who orchestrates all relationships? All lives? Do we not trust God to bring us to the one He would have use to marry (if He would have us marry at all)? Then why not move more slowly? Why date someone you don’t yet know? Why not start out as friends – protecting the hearts of both people involved? It’s not as though God’s plans will be foiled, that we must stake our claim outright for things to work out… And I’m not saying we should close off to the idea of a significant other, but maybe we should begin by getting to know them as friends rather than through this dating thing we do.